Being understood in Japan…

I have many friends who are learning Japanese through books, at school and by living here in Japan. They often tell me how difficult it is especially when it comes to nuances. The other thing I hear a lot is how they get frustrated in stores. Not because they can’t speak it but because half the time the clerk doesn’t try to understand them.

Even worth, one of my dearest friends came to Japan and needed to get his bicycle tires pumped. He went to the nearest garage that a friend recommended him. He doesn’t speak Japanese at all but with gestures and by showing the bicycle he was able to be understood. He calls me and tells me that it had been 30 minutes since he asked the staff and that no one had come to do it. So he asks me to talk to the guy directly and make sure he understood the request. I talk to the guy just to find out that they don’t offer such service. It was winter and my friend was freezing his ass waiting for nothing outside. It pissed me off. The guy basically was ignoring my friend and just waited it out for him to leave eventually instead of trying to tell him it was not possible.

My friends often ask me if it’s because their accent sucks or because they didn’t use a sentence correctly. I mean how hard can it be to distinguish “orange juice kudasai” and “orenji juusu kudasai”?

Rest assured my friends, how well you speak Japanese has nothing to do with it. And I mean NOTHING.

I went to the supermarket today to buy some groceries. I have a card which allows me to save points everytime I buy something there. I don’t even need it because the number of points you get each time is just ridiculous and it doesn’t even offer interesting discounts. Anyways, the cashier tells me it comes to ￥1,786. I made the mistake to put down my card first and then the bills on top of it. The woman asks me if I have a card, I say yes and point at it. She picks up the bills gives me the change and realizes that the card was under the bills. See, normally they take your card first and then they charge you. She apologizes and tells me she can add the points afterwards. I tell her politely that it’s okay because it’s only 3 ridiculous points (which comes to ￥３）and that I don’t need them. She says it will take only a second.

Now I’m in trouble.

Everyone knows that when a store tells you that, it will take a lot more time than what they tell you, especially when it comes to magnetic cards.

She wants to do her job right so I let her, but then she calls the manager. I tell her that it’s not a big deal, that they shouldn’t go through so much trouble just for 3 points I don’t even want. The manager tells me it will only take a few seconds. Which means a few minutes.

Now I’m in real trouble.

They start arguing about the steps to take. The cashier asks me if I have some time to spare. I tell her again that I don’t want the points and that people are waiting behind. At that point I’m thinking “if they had listened to me the first time, I would be on the bus on my way home already”. That’s when the manager pulls out a manual out of her pocket.

Now I’m in a black hole.

I got sucked in it, and I can’t get out. No matter what I say, they want to put the points on my card. I felt like Mickey Rourke taking the elevator down to Hell in Angel Heart. I asked them what language I was speaking to them and of course they gave me that empty look they do so well when they don’t know what to do or say.

So, just to tell you my dear friends, you could speak Japanese as perfect as a native and you still won’t get the message through because they JUST DON’T LISTEN! Communication is a real pain in the ass out here. So don’t hesitate to confront them and put pressure on them whenever this kind of thing happens. They have to learn a lesson or two.